I have recently watched the Menendez Brothers on Netflix (please be aware this show has a lot of references of sexual abuse incase you decide to go and watch it). Afterwards, I spent some time reading comments about it online.
What made me sad, and angry, is how many people are unable to empathise with what the abuse and trauma that the brothers went through. I knew that there would be a number of people who do not believe them, incase it is not obvious, I do believe them.
But even those individuals who do believe the brothers, may say ‘it does not justify what they did’. As a therapist, I have heard, in graphic detail, the sexual abuse that people have suffered at the hands of a family members (dad, mum, siblings, cousin, uncle etc monsters live amongst us, and are often the ones closest to us when it comes to sexual abuse).
I know just how much it impacts people for the rest of their lives. I can understand why, the Menendez brothers, were not able to simply leave and move out. Its similar to why victims of Domestic Abuse do not just get up and leave. Physical abuse is not only physical. Where there is physical abuse, there will always be a psychological trauma attached. There will be a fear, a very real fear, of the repercussions if you do try to leave.
The reason I am sharing this is because whatever trauma you have been through in life, whenever you choose to share, whoever you choose to share it with – make sure this is someone you trust. That you can trust them to provide you with empathy and support, because sadly, not everyone will do this.
Find your people. This might be friends or a professional, or both. You will need their help to get through whatever you are struggling with.
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